The Modern Man

Kay Hymowitz from The Dallas Morning News wrote an interesting opinion article about his opinions of the modern man. For him all men seem to be behind in being able to grow up.

Now meet the 21st-century you, also 26. You've finished college and work in a cubicle in a large Chicago financial-services firm. You live in an apartment with a few single guy friends. In your spare time, you play basketball with your buddies, download the latest indie songs from iTunes, have some fun with the Xbox 360, take a leisurely shower, massage some product into your hair and face – and then it's off to bars and parties, where you meet, and often bed, girls of widely varied hues and sizes. Wife? Kids? House? Are you kidding?

I wish my life was like that. (I actually happen to be 26 right now.) Who even has a life like that? I tend to be pretty hard on affluent white people. I've been known to snicker at the silly things that honkies do. However, what I'm interested in here is the writer himself. Mr. Hymowitz has a few issues with the modern world and his generalizations tell more about what concerns him, than what is happening in America.

With women, you could argue that adulthood is in fact emergent. Single women in their 20s and early 30s are joining an international New Girl Order, hyper-achieving in both school and an increasingly female-friendly workplace, while packing leisure hours with shopping, traveling and dining with friends. Single young males, or SYMs, by contrast, often seem to hang out in a playground of drinking, hooking up, playing Halo 3 and, in many cases, underachieving. With them, adulthood looks as though it's receding.

What is this NGO? I know quite a few "jet-set" women and none of them have told me of any such NGO. On top of that most American women have never left the country and don't plan to go father than the time share resorts. The rest of the article is mostly alot of pseudo-psychology about why men aren't becoming adults and that it's the media's fault.

It seems to me that this is less of a commentary of the modern man, but casting nerd culture as an affront to male adulthood. Somehow a "real" adult is meant to have cast aside silly things like Halo 3 and iTunes and get in the real world with a real job working with heavy machines and responsibilities.

The problem I see is that the roles that are presented to us in the media, and the roles that men are able to fill now has changed dramatically over the years. We have not settled on what it means to be an adult in the modern age. (Frankly it's something we figure out in hindsight.) We are constantly being told that we need to get a "good" education, (like at least a masters) and then a steady job with a steady paycheck. In actuality there really is no set model. Some of the most influential people of the past and present hardly can be considered to have lived a normal progression of adult stages.